Fandango Provocatively asks:
You just won a giant lottery jackpot. What are the first three things you’re going to do with the money you won?
- Pay off any debts, including the mortgage, which still exists despite now being disabled.
- Whack a load of money to the energy company so we don’t have to think twice about putting the heating on. In fact, look at taking ourselves off the grid completely. At least I could then be as clean as possible.
- Maybe buy a small car. It’d be quite nice to have the freedom provided by driving again. If my eyes weren’t up to it, hire a chauffeur. I’d want it to be electric from my clean energy source, and I have no need for a Chieftain Tank.
- Buy a tandem. It’d be indescribable to have the freedom provided by cycling again. I’d definitely need someone to ride out with me. I’d give first refusal to Mrs Bump, she’d ride in front and I could spend the day with my head up her ass. (But I suspect I know the answer.)
- Hire an electrician to fix the bathroom light.
- Hire a plumber to fix the bathroom tap.
- Hire a pest control guy to look at the roof. Every now and again I hear rats up there. We put poison down, the noise goes, but a few months later it returns. Ideally I’d like to get up there and to see where they get in, but first, I can’t get up a ladder now, also my eyes aren’t good enough any more to see whatever tiny hole they use.
- Hire a cleaner. This place has become a shithole since I have been disabled.
- Any money left over, I’d see what I could do with it that was useful. Lots of people require help from charities; maybe I could help? Some people are multi-billionaires while others are using food banks, for fuck’s sake. That isn’t right.
- Hire a tutor to teach me to count.
Oh, and I almost forgot. Mrs Bump wants to retire. Working for the NHS is shit. Every year she is asked to do more and more. Every year she is told her value is less and less. I don’t want to retire. I can’t possibly imagine not doing what I do.
Mister Bump 
You win! I can’t beat that with a very big stick! 🏆
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Oh man. I would rethink those plans…sell the house and all its problems, the. Settle any debts. Find a small spot with little need for work, a view or small outside terrace and enjoy most of the winnings on whatever measure your heart desires .
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Leisure …
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Nah, I’m here to stay. I love it here, esp in the summer. It is so quiet and I can get down to the most beautiful river and watch the sunset. Besides, I have unlimited cash, right? I can fix all that shit. Throwing money at things is easy. I’ve been doing that my whole life
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There’s beautiful rivers and oceans everywhere ,friend.Just saying to keep your options open. Could be a small property nearby even, but without the worries.
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I think any house comes with worries. I just want a small piece of the world where I can go to get away from the world, and this is it.
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The. You have your paradise, my friend. I am happy for you.
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Doesn’t your council have a rat catcher who can set traps and find the entry point? Even our poverty-struck council still offers that service.
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I spoke to a client yesterday who still had the leak in her kitchen that she had last week. She’s been told that someone will come to assess in two weeks. Not to fix, but to assess.
I wouldn’t put money on rat catchers.
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You never know; they might consider rats more of a health hazard than a leak.
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Very practical list.
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Absolutely. Buy more cat food! Even moreso 🤣
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No yachts, planes or villas?
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Nah, I have all I need.
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Very refreshing thinking.
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Might as well get a small backyard telescope while you are at it 😝🤣
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Might press the camera back into action while I’m at it!
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You definitely went above and beyond. But I guess your 10 relatively modest things could add up to three biggies.
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Once I get going…
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I had a dream the other night that I won 250 million. I bought land and built lots of houses, like a small community, then I found people struggling to find rentals and rented them out at a really low cost. The people had to save towards buying their own place and help with maintaining common areas. Wasn’t I nice?
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Sounds lovely, but you’d be better renting not selling. The land will appreciate and you can buy more.
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I don’t think I was interested in making money. I was just angry about people being ripped off
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Not to make money per se but to reinvest it into more land and more houses. I think the sad fact is that people buy property because it appreciates.
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You win Deb! I would pay off all debts and my mortgage ( not even half way through it yet) but still work five days a week
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