Every week, I enjoy reading people’s responses to Melanie’s Share Your World prompts, though I usually don’t have time to respond myself.
I thought she asked an excellent question yesterday, though, and especially in the context of the answers I read so far (everyone thinks the opposite to me), I thought the question was irresistable.
Melanie asked:
What’s more important to you – family or friends?
I broadly see good people and bad people. Broadly. A good person is somebody whose outlook on life coincides with my own. The same kinds of values. Again, broadly, because I never met anyone whose values coincide exactly with mine. That “good person” might well go on to become a friend. A bad person, I will walk away from, because life is too short to be mixed up with them.
Whether those good and bad people happen to be related to me or not, doesn’t really come into it.
So, for me, friends win out, every time. No contest.
Now, note that I’m not saying here that family are necessarily unimportant. I’m saying that the important members of my family (which is a small subset of the entire family), I also consider to be friends, first and foremost. I don’t see somebody as either one or the other. My wife, for example, I see as also a friend (sometimes 🤣).
Conversely, an asshole is an asshole is an asshole, and I will drop them, family or not.
Mister Bump 
Well said Pete. Bad people, even if related to us, must be avoided.
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That, I feel, is the big conundrum for people who say “family”.
What do you do when Relative X is an asshole? Do you still mix with them, because they are family?
I’m not knocking that situation, because many people do just that. But not for me.
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Many are forced by others in the family to meet them. I’ve such relatives but I have a very formal relationship with them
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Yes I have family too, where it is cordial rather than friendly. Over the years I have pretty much cut them out altogether. It has become easier as I got older. Living remotely helped, too. Moving a long way from the rest of the family. Those I stay in touch with are the ones I value.
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That’s is good solution, but a bit tedious to move away from the baddies.
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😂 Your last comment made me laugh. Sometimes an asshole is simply a bum, but sometimes an asshole is an asshole because they spout shit all the time. 🙂
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my sentiments too mr. bump!
Friends are also very important to me, and I also consider my family to be friends. X
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I’d agree, sorta, but that’s not quite what I said. I would qualify “my family”. Some of ’em. A few. Others, I purposefully have nothing to do with. Most, I am ambivalent.
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I’ve always said “Who needs enemies when you have family?” Gotta agree with you.
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absolutely.
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I would always put family first mainly because they are my rock. I’ve moved enough that good friends are scattered especially now, interaction is not frequent.
Sent from Yahoo Mail for iPad
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My best friend lives in Paris and I have not seen her since 2008. She’s still my best friend.
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Mine are thousands of miles away
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Thanks for Sharing Your World about relationships. 🙂 I take it from your response that most of the folks whose SYW this week you have read, have said “family” over friends? It’s true that some people do value their family above anyone else, but some of us don’t. Our friends ARE our family, because our own family have turned out to be disappointing in some way or downright unlikeable. As you put it “an asshole is an asshole is an asshole.” It doesn’t matter if they’re related to one or not, the stench overrides. Thanks again Pete for chiming in! 🙂
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Correct assumption, yes, everyone said “family” (that I read).
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Okay, if you’d like opposing opinion – Jilly of jilywily.wordpress.com had a great take on the question. If you have a moment, maybe you’d enjoy reading that? Thanks again for stopping in!
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Thanks. I remember Jilly from when I used to do SLS. I don’t think the two are identical, though, just, as I say, because I have dropped some family members like a stone.
It really is as simple as “genes don’t come into it”.
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Couldn’t agree more my friend 👍🖤
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