Mister Bump UK

The Proposal

After I had an attempt at that Shakespearean sonnet the other week, I read about Petrarchan sonnets, read that they were more complex to write, in English, than Shakespearean sonnets.

So, I chanced my arm. I wrote this as a more traditional love poem, and that itself is way out of my comfort zone, let alone the structure. I’ve also found several nuances with things like theme, rhyme scheme etc. The obvious ones I followed, but I’m sure there are sublteties I missed out on. Meh.

Someone suggested I give this to Mrs Bump for christmas. But I don’t want her keeling her over just yet – she still has her uses!

Doubt if I’ll write any more sonnets, but I said that last time.

Your beauty strikes, like spring bouquets, adored,
Compelling mix, the weave of practiced hand,
How could I feign indifference and withstand?
Spread radiance on the wind with every spore.
Each time we meet, you tempt me even more,
Each fragrant bloom ignites at your command,
Your scent bids me accede to your demand,
Each parting, I yearn for your next encore.

Our paths, tight intertwined, can never part,
My ally as we’ll wend our way back home,
A symphony, or masterpiece of art,
A David, or a Percy Shelley tome,
Your nectar sweetens each beat of my heart,
‘Til winter storms confirm that summer’s done.

Published by Mister Bump UK

Separated with a grown/flown daughter. In life, I designed IT systems, taking a career break as a bicycle mechanic, until interrupted by a stroke in 2016, aged 48. On my way back into full-time work, I developed health-related apps and performed voluntary work. I enjoy composing limericks and flash fiction in my spare time.

34 comments

  5. Very Shakespearean; I’m not a sonnet fan, as you know, but this is excellent.🙂
    Poet Hobbo had bee in his bonnet,
    Trying to write Mrs H. a nice sonnet,
    The struggling bard
    Found the rhyme scheme too hard,
    Till he set his mate, Dauphy upon it.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • Remember you don’t have to write the lines in the order they appear in the poem. I found it was more the subtleties: theme is this, first stanza is this, second is this etc. You can throw all that out of the window and write a “modern” sonnet, but this was really an exercise to see if I could do it traditionally.

      I don’t know about you but I find it difficult to write something that is praising anyone, really, because things end up too flowery for my liking.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

      • I think that because I was in such a regulated job I have a tendency to rebel against anything which dictates rules, especially when I am writing. I appreciate that they are good exercises in discipline but I’ve had enough of that in my life.
        I agree on the writing about praise or love which I also find difficult. That’s why I prefer to do it tongue in cheek or try and add some humour.
        The above probably explains why I will never take myself too seriously as a poet! 😂

        Liked by 1 person

        Reply

  7. Very well done and hard to do but you succeeded.:) Lovely.! The 13th-century poet and notary Giacomo da Lentini is credited with the sonnet’s invention for expressing courtly love. The Sicilian School of poets who surrounded him at the Emperor’s Court are credited with its spread. Interesting. I think we tend to think Shakespeare. So my ancestors
    are credited with it.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • Oh, I didn’t realise you were Italian. Yes, Petrarcha basically took the idea and ran with it. In English, they are far more rigid than Shakespearean Sonnets. I found so, anyway.
      I started off writing iambic pentameter but subsequently found that his sonnets were not necessrily so. That part was something that became hard-and-fast with Shakespeare, apparently.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  12. I could become an Italian citizen because my father came over from Sardinia and if not your father, you can
    do your grandfather if they never became a citizen. But it is so expensive and you have to file everything in Italian which I do not know how to speak. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  13. I don’t think my grandmother or father on my mother’s side was born in Ireland, not sure who came over. All I
    know is they settled in Pittsburgh, PA. Yes, I have seen pictures of Liverpool and it seems like it is still a very
    large port. Before all this mess started wanted to move to Ireland/Scotland or England. But everything changed
    for all of us.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • they’re all pretty different, politically. Scotland and Wales tend to be to the left, England to the right. In Northern Ireland, they still vote along cultural lines. Ireland probably has the fairest system, just because it was all thought about when ie gained independence in C20th.
      So all that would probably affect how “at home” you felt in the different parts..

      Like

      Reply

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